DuHS

Get a life. Get a real job. We never needed a Department of Homeland Security, and we never will. Fuck you. Quit spying on and harassing me online. Stop sending web bots and AI profiles at me wasting my very valuable time. Fuck you. I want my money back, assholes. Why do you love Christopher D. Baker and Shirlington Limo so goddamned much, huh? America could survive one hundred 9/11s, I'm no pussy. Fuck you assholes. Go away nepotists, criminals. Building a corporate castle system isn't going to save that old money. DHS, you're the best argument for smaller government (and birth control) that there is.

He Jerks Hard for the Phonies

"I work hard!" he told a room of openly uninterested listeners, something he did a lot of the time, especially after he left work at his private firm, his minuscule fiefdom. OK: especially at work, since his employees never listened to what he had to say because they were immune to bullshit. He didn't care. He was better since he made more money than they did, thanks to ripping off all of them through creative accounting and delusions of adequacy, and legally too.

"Goddamned deadbeats--won't work, plenty of jobs out there, I know!!*#^!" As was always the case, nobody acted as though they were listening, and on a conscious level, they weren't. The man kept going on anyway, yammering away while seven people in rags were lined-up outside clutching signs with various inscriptions on them, but all of them essentially said "Will Work for Food" in one way or another. Most of them had been working weeks before, and very hard.

"Spoiling my view!" he muttered. He was only 35, but came off as a moldering 88.

"For the love of God, would you please shut the fuck up, sir, asshole--whateverthefuck your fuckin' name is? Jesus, fucker." asked and projectile-vomited a young lady in black leather, festooned with tattoos and piercings from head-to-toe.

"Why don't you go get a job, like me? I'm even self-employed, eh, top that, you loud-mouthed Goth-cooze!" he growled, drool flowing from both sides of his mouth, a vein throbbing on his forehead, and a visible erection showing through his dockers. Baboons have their own male species.

"I have a job, bitch," she shot back instantly, visibly smacking him in the face with the comment. "But...everyone fuckin' works, you crybaby asshole. What makes you so special, fuckface?" and she sat back down in the booth she was in and turned her back to him disrespectfully. There was a round of applause for a solid three minutes, but a few in the corner slunk out after paying their bill, looking suspiciously ignorant, even furtively so, as they went across the street to do business at the asshole's unimportant fiefdom.

What gives: Update on the blog and the DC Madam account

As you can tell, I'm not writing (or writhing as much, key here), I'm not posting as much here. The reasons are simple: I have a book to finish, I'm not getting paid for any of this, and I don't owe you anything, nothing whatsoever. There's this weird expectation on the Internet--borne of intellectual slovenliness and cynicism--that everything should be free, everything.

I shouldn't have to remind anyone of this, but what the hell: Nothing in life is really free.

I'll post occasionally on here when I feel like it--when something truly needs to be said--but I have no desire to react to every world and domestic event unless it's going to have some reasonable impact, if the observation could truly contribute to the dialog. For the most part, that's been the case on this blog, but you begin to realize that the beast just wants to be fed, giving nothing in-return, nada, zip. The question, "What's in it for me?" is perfectly reasonable under the circumstances.

Guess who the last person was who made sure I was paid? A clue: she was found hanged in a shed next to her mother's trailer three years ago in May, having been run to her death by the U.S. Courts and Bush loyalist prosecutors. How much help did I get from the "crowd" during all of that? None whatsoever, thanks. She was a criminal--no less--but I was apparently "useful" so she tapped the federal defender's office to pay me for research work on her case, and she hired me, in other words. That's right, a former whore and madam was paying me to help exonerate her, but she also showed more concern about the state of things than you, she put her money where he mouth was to some extent...easily more than you.

I know the economy is "bad," you don't have to tell me, I'm just down the road from Elkhart, Indiana, an epicenter of economic decline that's going unattended. People are just being left to rot there just as they are across the nation. Yet, there are some of you, some readers, who are sitting pretty and who don't really give a damn about the state of things--hollow platitudes aside. It's you creeps that I hate the most and you're in my sights, I'm gunning for frauds like you and will never stop pointing you out, along with the rest of the scum wrecking society, more through indifference than anything else.

They say that hiding your light under a bushel is a sin, but many of you folks make it happen, you make it real. You're the reason that most artists consider burning their work out of defiance, so that you can never enjoy their fruits. Why would someone who's not being facilitated want to assist in saving this shit-house when no one really cares? That's a question I've been asking myself for over two decades, but I don't give up just because of a coterie of jaded turds. Save it: Talk is cheap. Major indie news sites and blogs are suffering the same as I am, getting nothing in donations or any sort of assistance. Of course, this is part of the plan of elites, to starve and silence the progressive voice, but your apathy is far more deadly, more destructive.

The DC Madam account: It's nearing completion of the editing and revision process. You will have to pay for it to read it since I'm planning on a hard-copy edition first, you'll actually have to work to pirate it, little FYI. It should clock in at around 400+ pages (with an index, a species that's nearly extinct in publishing when it's easier than ever to do them), it will have no illustrations or photographs, kiddie illustrations and will be for serious readers only.

The book is an historical account, not a tell-all omnibus text you'd normally have from a kiss-ass mainstream publisher. This was a story for the Internet age, therefore, it took place in that realm in a lot of cases. No one player can know everything that occurred in the story since it played-out on multiple-levels: telecommunications, interpersonal interactions (yes, the sex, and more...), and in court filings, and so on. So, take note Hollywood: not conducive to a narrative rewrite, not a story that lends itself to the cinematic that much.

Hollywood would tell a false narrative anyway, as they tend to do with stories like this.

There are no shoot-outs in the text and it's not a Tom Clancy novel (phew!), but it does have elements of a real world sensation--it was what most of the hype claims to be, it was a profoundly bizarre and unprecedented case in our nation's legal, cultural and political history. The liars like Alex Jones will continue to claim that Palfrey was "murdered" by "shadowy government operatives," which is unsupported by any physical evidence. If Mr. Jones and his clown possess really knew something, they'd be in court, period, the same applying to the rest of the tinfoil hat crowd (like Alex Constantine).

There will be other sex scandals, but the DC Madam one was a line-in-the-sand. There will never be one like it anytime soon and these scandals can be expected to get uglier, the stakes have risen to the point that someone taking Palfrey's route can expect what she got, a legal pile-on by most of the government's judicial and law enforcement bureaucracy. The account is not a conspiracy theory text since it actually contains primary data, actual information pertinent to the case. There is speculation on my part--as a player in the event, something I'm more than entitled to based on what I experienced and witnessed where others--like the conspiracy nut crowd--haven't. That's it.

Presenting: A $1,000 wise ass award and prize regarding the DC Madam...

WWW--I noticed recently that former DC Madam counselor Montgomery Blair Sibley's Why Just Her has now been scanned and is in Google books (search engine, you can now search and read the book itself, though it's partial), from a recent and casual search. But this isn't about that, it was just the trigger of my memory over the gaggle of conspiracy nuts and know-it-all wise asses who think they "know the score" on how the DC Madam died. None of them who I have debated with have even read the autopsy and toxicology reports.

In reality, they do know, but won't accept the truth because it doesn't fit into their moronic personal mythology or some notion they got into their heads when they were hanging out with other rednecks and sucking on a joint of a pipe filled with crystal meth. But enough about Alex Constantine...

Here it is: if you can prove in a court of law that the DC Madam was murdered by government operatives, as many nuts are still claiming, you get $1,000 from yours truly. You'll never do it, it will never happen. You want to know why? You don't want to know why, that's the fuckin' problem you dumb asshole. You don't want to know the truth, you don't care, and for you, the believers in her murder, this prize is for you. That's right assholes: fuck you.

Postscript on Sarah Palin...

Not only does Palin fakes orgasms, but also that she's part of the same species as the rest of us.

"Okay, you lazy bitch": A 2001 letter from Hunter S. Thompson over production on the "Rum Diaries"

WWW--This was sent to me by a friend and reader, it's great. Thompson was getting the usual Hollywood treatment of being fucked around and got tired of it, so he dashed this fax off to the production executive at the time on the film. It sums-up what I always thought getting a movie made must be like, just a lot of bullshit, babysitting rich, spoiled assholes and their sycophants. Fuck that, nothing's worth that shit.

A doosie from the transcript:

...Fuck this. We have a good writer, we have the main parts casted & we have a very marketable movie that will not even be hard to make....

And all you are is a goddamn Bystander, making stupid suggestions & jabbering now & then like some half-bright Kid with No Money & No Energy & no focus except on yr. own tits.... I'm sick of hearing about Cuba & Japs & yr. Yo-yo partners who want to change the story because the violence makes them Queasy.

Shit on them. I'd much rather deal with a Live asshole than a Dead worm with No Light in his Eyes....

Couldn't have put it better myself. What a man, what a guy, so wonderfully honest. Get rid of middle-management, yesterday. Redundant. Development hell this, bitch.

Okay, you lazy bitch," Letters Of Note.com, 09.17.2009: http://www.lettersofnote.com/2009/09/okay-you-lazy-bitch.html?showComment=1253559817062#c701251295396282760

Once again: Check comic genius Eric Filipkowski's site, 'cuz he's a rocket man

This guy is a laugh-riot. Ever since I began this site I've had a link up to his, and he's just genuinely funny. Not only are his cultural observations usually spot-on, but his fictional routines are simply hilarious. You won't be disappointed, trust me, he's got the funny gene! (he's on my linkroll to-the-left, hit it!) Fuck you, I wish I was half as funny as you are, Eric! ;0)

Porn industry wants a bailout

WWW--You gotta be kidding me. OK, I assume as everyone else does, that pornographers tend to be moral imbeciles with no sense of how corrupt and disgusting they really are, granted. But this is something: Larry Flynt and "Girls Gone Wild" owner Joe Francis want part of the bailout money. Will they get it? Get real.

I'd like to thank Larry Flynt for doing virtually nothing in assisting the late Deborah Jeane Palfrey. He didn't need to prove to me or anyone else that he's a greedy little creep who exploits women for their bodies, and in every way he can get away with. That he's scum is a given.

Francis is a little turd with tiny dick and no brains. Word has it that Larry once fucked a chicken--at least according to Al Goldstein, yet another pornographer, although he hit-the-skids ages ago around 2002. Compared to Larry Flynt, Al's a fucking aristocrat, a gentleman. At least he read Plato's "The Allegory of the Cave," and even understood it! Flynt? Francis? Forget it.

In the words of Al: "Eat a leper, fuck you," Larry Flynt.

"Porn industry seeks federal bailout," CNN, 01.07.2009:

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2009/01/07/porn-industry-seeks-federal-bailout/

Blag-o-mania! (a fuckin' satire)

"He [Lincoln] entered political life in one of those eras of delusive prosperity which so often precede great financial convulsions... . It was too much to expect of the Illinois Legislature that it should understand that the best thing it could do to forward this prosperous tendency of things was to do nothing.'' --Lincoln biographers John M. Hay and John G. Nicolay


"Fucking fuck is fucked! Fuck 'em, fuckity-fuck-fuck-fuck!" yelled the Governor of Illinois at the Lieutenant Governor and his svelte Chicago wife, Patti. He was jumping up-and-down on a stuffed-canine, a bizarre scene soon to be available on DVD and Blu-Ray™ with added bonus features. Fuck. His Azar's™ Big Boy look was showing today and he was sporting a pompadour that could double for a beaver-pelt coming in for reentry.

"Look, fucker," stated the governor, "Either fuckin' get those fuckin' assholes off of the Tribune's editorial board, or fuck it, fucker. And no, I don't wear a fucking wig you asshole." He was being more restrained than usual. Patti had no druthers spelling shit out, fuck me for stating it.

"Fuck this shit, I'm the fucker who wears the pants in this family...'hold up that fucking Cubs shit, fuck 'em!' Gimme the fuckin' phone Rod," she shrieked, grabbing it like an IRS agent collecting on a delinquent tax bill from a casino owner. Her gun was drawn as well and she nervously pressed the .45-automatic to her sweat-covered temple repeatedly as she yelled into the receiver.

Machievelli never saw "la chienne" coming...

"Nuthin', and I mean nuthin' goes on in this fuckin' one horse town of Chicago without my fuckin' say-so, y'hear asswipes?! No more "Mrs. O'Leary's cow jokes either--and when do we get the bathroom retiled?!" Even the governor was shuddering over that last part of her remark. Fuck. Meanwhile, Assistant U.S. Attorney [NAME REDACTED] was listening-in with his wife and kids after a prolonged porno...you don't want to know.

"Heh-heh, I'm going to have to take this off of speaker-phone guys--uh, hold on! Er, shit, um, ahhh fuck!" muttered the government prosectuor. "OK guys, outta here, me and your mother need to listen-in on some very intimate conversations. The Governor of Illinois and his wife are talking out-their-asses again, bye-bye, chop-chop!" He clapped his hands together vigorously as he said it, and the kids left--resigned--but not without leaving a listening device of their own in the room so that they could monitor things in their bedrooms.

"Mom and dad are fucked, [NAME REDACTED] it's that simple," said the pie-faced teenager as they walked down the hall.

"Fuckin'-A-straight," said his sister. "Why can't we listen-in on private conversations too? Why do they get to have all the fucking fun?" Fucking adults...are there any of them left these days?

U.S. Attorney Patrick J. Fitzgerald and his new bride were sitting down to a cup-o'-joe that morning: "Gosh-and-golly, darling, you have no idea how much emotional damage listening these wiretaps has done to my fragile eggshell mind--the language of these people. We never tawked like this in Flatbush--never!!!" He was becoming overexcited by it all, huffing and puffing away, a real sight, a bourgeois hoot, but that's the effect of Jesuit education for ya'.

"Now-now, dear," said his celeb-chasing law groupie wife, "The blood-pressure, remember, remember, oh my, oh my. You know this isn't going to help you with the 'personal problem' we've both been experiencing lately," she sighed, exhaling a very long time. An imp of the perverse snickered within the walls of their home, but got a little electrical-shock from the wiring.

"What the fuck was that sound?! ...'People now know that if you're part of a corrupt conduct, where one hand is taking care of the other and contracts are going to people, you don't have to say the word 'bribe' out loud... . And I think people need to understand we won't be afraid to take strong circumstantial cases into court,' " he exclaimed loudly at the breakfast table. He could feel his own sense of outrage in his now-swollen testicles. His wife wisely interved again.

"Patrick--listen to me: this is like that I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby prosecution, dear. Disclosure on it was, erm...premature." She warmly grasped his hand as she told him this, but it was the last thing she needed to say this morning. Timing is everything, especially when applying the "rhythm method." The Fitzgerald clan had a long history of premature ejaculation, the main reason the U.S. Attorney was sitting there arguing with his new wife at all. Hey, Irish doormen need a little piece occasionally, Jesus Christ.

"The conduct would make Lincoln roll over in his grave!" screamed the U.S. Attorney. This marital row wasn't going to blow over anytime soon. The nuclear option was considered and adopted by both sides that morning.

Wife Jennifer retorted, "Lincoln was questionable too--he was the most successful railroad lawyer of his day. He even owned land near Council Bluffs, Iowa, then pushed to create the Transcontinental Railroad through emergency legislation that he proposed to Congress, he wasn't so clean. Besides, he used to tell dirty jokes to visitors at the White House, and often!" She was becoming aroused, with that flushed look that's the same shade of a baboon's...you get the picture.

He was going to have to hit the books for a reply to that one, but he was qualified, determined, and dedicated to this job. He would spend long nights at the Chicago Public Library and the office as he always did. He would not suffer from premature ejaculation any longer, even though his self-confidence was currently flagging, if not looking a little droopy. He began reading his Kipling, just like Governor Blagojevich: No "If[s]" for this prosecutor, he was a man, my son.

"Fuck," said a mafia soldier listening-in on the Fitzgerald breakfast.

Later that day, the Fitzgeralds ate out at a local mob-owned bistro in Oak Park and bumped into the Blagos. The grub was good, although the U.S. Attorney swore (not literally, and not under oath) that he heard someone beating-the-shit out a busboy in the washroom. Fitzgerald looked across the room and saw a familiar face. The Governor of Illinois waved and the U.S. Attorney did likewise. "Fuck it," they all thought to themselves. Appearances are everything in Chicago, after all.

The ghost of Mike Royko grinned from his crevice in Chicago's Watertower, a structure once derided by no lesss a figure than Oscar Wilde.

"See, we can all get along, dear--we don't have to use such coarse language with people, and we can all act civilized in each other's presence even though he's investigating me, imperiling my very existence, and not just politically. I have more control than you, lady Macbeth." His wife seethed, and began eyeing the small, white phallic-shaped object jutting from her purse. "Yeah, I know dear--heh-heh--I know all-too-well." It was going to be a cold day in hell before...you know (starts with an "F").

[Ed., 01.04.2009--This reads like an episode of "Deadwood." I should have added the appellation, "cocksucker" and it would have fit.]

What is the extraordinary nature of the Blagojevich scandal?

"I can't wait to begin to tell my side of the story and to address you guys and, most importantly, the people of Illinois. That's who I'm dying to talk to."--Standing Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich.

Chicago, Illinois--These are truly momentous times, a real threshold moment in American history. The Illinois Supreme Court's rejection of state Attorney General Lisa Madigan's filing to remove standing Governor Rod Blagojevich is a stunning example of a political and economic order on the ropes. It raises the specter of a power-vacuum and the continuation of a vicious Machiavellianism at the heart of American politics. In other words, intrigue.

Is that what's happening in the Blagojevich scandal? It wouldn't surprise anyone except maybe a High School teacher, the last to know what's going on at City Hall.

U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald's case that the Governor attempted to "sell" Barack Obama's senate seat and did so actively in what he's called a "corruption crime spree" looks good on paper, it's convincing, but his outrage over things like how many times and permutations Blagojevich said "fuck" smacks of character attack and over-zealousness. Welcome to Chicago, Pat.

Coming from the Chicago U.S. Attorney, you'd be led to believe that Blagojevich was Rasputin and that his downfall was virtually inevitable based on the evidence he claims to have on him. Fitzgerald made similarly broad claims with the Plame case, winning a minor conviction on I. "Scooter" Libby, former chief of staff to Vice President Dick Cheney which was quickly commuted by President Bush. Go team (boo team, you lost, you promised more than you could deliver).

Genson said it would be "frankly illegal" for the committee to base an impeachment recommendation on the criminal complaint against Blagojevich. The complaint doesn't provide full conversations and context, he said, and it can't be cross-examined like a witness.

Rep. Jack Franks, D-Woodstock, challenged Genson to have Blagojevich testify.

"If we want the facts, we should have your client here. If you want to get to the facts, let's bring him here, let's ask the questions," Franks said. ("Attorney: Ill. governor won't fill senate vacancy," AP, 12.17.2008)

The federal investigation appears solid on the surface, but did Blagojevich and others close to him really take affirmative steps towards the completion of a crime? Why the rush to judgment? Did they (Blagojevich and others) technically break the law merely by talking about something but not taking any substantial actions towards completion? Is this a case of wishful thinking?

Blagojevich could have a very good case here. His counsel, Ed Genson, has raised some very good points because there's a strong possibility that no substantial steps were taken towards completion of the crime, just a lot of [expletive deleted] talk.

Context is everything in a criminal case (let alone a political one), and we have yet to see it in the release of the wiretaps. What were the comments before-and-after the ones released by the U.S. Attorney's Chicago office? What other evidence is there? Is the investigation near completion? Is the Governor still being wiretapped? What role did informants play in this, like Jess Jackson Jr.? Is Blagojevich's counsel currently being wiretapped? Since the investigation is not currently over, on what legal grounds should anyone claim the right to remove the Governor?

These are just a few of the questions that should be addressed by the prosecution, the GOP, the DNC, the Obama campaign, and Blagojevich's detractors in the Illinois State House and Senate, and within his own office.

These people need to state their case clearly, the onus being on them in our legal system. At this writing, Blagojevich's attorney has announced that the Governor will not name Barack Obama's successor in the senate, answering at least one question in this whole mess.

This chaos and loss of faith in icons of authority and power all reminds one of the last days of Tsarist Russia. I can hardly wait to hear what the Governor has to say in his defense, I'm dying too Rod. Will it include revelations about someone who arouses just as many suspicions of corruption, one Rahm Emanuel?

U.S. Attorney Fitzgerald might discover that Blagojevich and Emanuel share a similar vocabulary, both politically and linguistically. He had better hope he's right, but procedure that gives deference to government investigators and prosecutors could shield him if this is so. Whatever happened to due process?