Songs from the Site Meter: The SAIC Hollywood Trailer

Site Meter--[Cue Hollywood voiceover, a voice of authority--male, natch]

Announcer [black screen]: In a world where war-profiteers break their arms patting themselves on the back just miles from the graves of the victims of previous war-profiteers, there is SAIC. And where there is voter apathy, a dumbed-down consumer society, there stands...uh, a few hundred thousand who actually get it.

And in a country where a Black man can run for president as a Republican and be physically kicked-out of his own party's convention--let alone not implode up his own ass in a scene more camp than all previous others--anything is possible. [Cue announcer exhalation.]

Not content with accumulating a pile of petrochemical junk in-exchange for their souls, these heroes search the internet for corruptions, lies, and the scum who perpetuate it (politicians, the puppets of the Bawssmen). [Cue overemotional John Williams orchestral-sweep, then cut to a car filled with consumer items falling-off of a cliff, then exploding into flames. Cut to an image of sewers brimming with excrement.]

[Cut to black screen] Indefatigable in their well-honed wit, these heroes--just for one day--turn these vile forces back onto themselves, causing them to waste valuable time watching, monitoring, and reading these words you're reading right now. And if you stew cranberries like applesauce, they taste more like prunes than rhubarb does. Trust me.

These heroes days are spent researching and belittling that which begs to be ridiculed, slammed, and exposed for what it is: walking, shambling, pus-inflated deathclowns with a permagrin. [Cut to images of various Republican and Democratic politicians over the last 60-years, many of them laughing. Next, cut to an explosion without any context whatsoever for postmodernist academics and movie critics. Cut back to black screen.]
Their goal: attrition-humor directed at corrupt government contractors, while understanding at the same time that freaks like SAIC could only function on earmarks culled from the taxpayer and expedited through the canoodling (look it up goddammit) of numerous public officials who should have been aborted before birth. [Cue sound of Model-T horn]

Can they save human society from its own pathetic self-inflicted wounds? Who gives-a-shit? Any given Apocalypse has entertainment value galore.

Now: if only we could find a way to sell the rights after we're all dead... [mumbling]

[End]

Domain Name saic.com ? (Commercial) IP Address 198.151.13.# (Science Applications International Corporation (SA) ISP Science Applications International Corporation (SA Location Continent : North America Country : United States (Facts) State : Virginia City : Arlington Lat/Long : 38.8782, -77.1054 (Map) Language English (U.S.) en-us Operating System Microsoft WinXP Browser Internet Explorer 6.0 Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 6.0; Windows NT 5.1; SV1; .NET CLR 1.1.4322; .NET CLR 2.0.50727; .NET CLR 3.0.04506.648; .NET CLR 3.5.21022; InfoPath.1) Javascript version 1.3 Monitor Resolution : 1280 x 1024 Color Depth : 32 bits Time of Visit Sep 4 2008 8:02:11 pm Last Page View Sep 4 2008 8:03:49 pm Visit Length 1 minute 38 seconds Page Views 2 Referring URL Visit Entry Page http://chickasawpick...-hey-sites-more.html Time Zone UTC-5:00 Visitor's Time Sep 4 2008 8:02:11 am Visit Number 40,774

Songs from the Site Meter Part II A: The Military Loves J-7

SITE METER--Granted, I wasn't serious about ('aboot' in Canada) giving anyone a chicklet (TM), but it was a military man who answered my question, possibly a big-shot. He read a long time, and he was probably sitting a few-doors-down from Ronald Roughead. Or was it the retired Colonel himself? Doubtful, he's retired, and what would someone lobbying for SAIC be doing working at the Army's Inspector General Agency?

Some words of advice to the IGA: INVESTIGATE SHIRLINGTON LIMO AND CHRISTOPHER D. BAKER, AND START DOING A THOROUGH JOB OF IT. START DRAGGING CONGRESSMEN BEFORE HEARINGS ON ILLEGAL LOBBYING. RANDALL CUNNINGHAM IS ONE-OF-MANY CRIMINALS. Just my two-cents.

Domain Name		army.mil ? (Military)
IP Address		199.10.37.# (USA Inspector General Agency)
ISP		USA Inspector General Agency
Location		Continent : North America Country : United States (Facts) State : Virginia City : Alexandria Lat/Long : 38.7909, -77.0947 (Map)
Language		English (U.S.) en-us
Operating System		Microsoft WinXP
Browser		Internet Explorer 6.0 Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 6.0; Windows NT 5.1; SV1; .NET CLR 2.0.50727; .NET CLR 1.1.4322; InfoPath.1; .NET CLR 3.0.04506.30)
Javascript		version 1.3
Monitor		Resolution : 1024 x 768 Color Depth : 16 bits
Time of Visit		Jan 25 2008 1:18:46 am
Last Page View		Jan 25 2008 1:34:48 am
Visit Length		16 minutes 2 seconds
Page Views		2
Referring URL
Visit Entry Page		http://chickasawpick...-meter-military.html
Visit Exit Page		http://chickasawpick...-meter-military.html
Out Click		Post a Comment http://www.blogger.c...=5699131125918911419
Time Zone		UTC-5:00
Visitor's Time		Jan 24 2008 1:18:46 pm
Visit Number		27,566

Bob Ney: "Hey man, I got a FAMILY!!"

Washington D.C.--And so did concentration camp guards, Bobbie. Maybe you never read the minutes from the Nuremburg trials--"I was just following orders", isn't a defense. GOP Rep. Bob Ney (Ohio) is now the third GOP scumbag to go down (pun-intended) because he took-bribes from Jack Abramoff.

The Washington Post's Johnathan Weisman is reporting today that Ney was "urge[d]" by House Majority Leader John Boehner (R-Oh.) not to seek reelection.

Well, Bobbie being the kind of moron to take orders regardless of the consequences did just that since being a congressional representative means mindless obedience to people who are going to fuck you.

It didn't take much persuasion, they just did what all employers do to Americans: they held his family and their future over-his-head, ..."reminding him that with a son in college and a daughter nearing college age, he will need money," according to several congressional Republican aides.

If he lost his House seat for the party, Boehner is said to have cautioned, Ney could not expect a lucrative career on K Street to pay those tuition bills, along with the hundreds of thousands of dollars in legal fees piling up." How nice it was for him to sweeten-the-pot, except it was with corn syrup. Like a "good" American, Bobbie bent-over and took it. Hell, we all do.

In his statement issued to the press, he said, “Ultimately this decision came down to my family. I must think of them first, and I can no longer put them through this ordeal." I honestly think this poor dumb schmuck with the horrible hairpiece really did think of his family. Too much, because he put himself and his family above the common good, and the obvious interests of his constituents and this nation. This is hardly unique, most Americans think this way, and it's erroneous and amoral.

Do I think Ney's guilty? Absolutely, he's even had staff-members being subpoenaed about whether-or-not he took free meals (man, these guys come-cheap!) and a Golf trip to Scotland (sound familiar?) from lobbyists.

Wine me, dine me...you know the rest.

This blog wishes the GOP luck in finding someone in Ohio who isn't tainted to take Ney's place, they'll need it. All of this is about distancing liabilities like Bob Ney from the GOP, but when they're all corrupt, where do they turn? On each other--naturally--which is good. Calling another Willy Lohmann, death of a congressman. A-men.