Caligulaugh

It was once written by one of the great Roman chroniclers that the insane emperor Caligula once remarked after his football team lost (brutish athletes liked molesting adolescent boys then too) that, were he able, that he'd cut the throats of the Coliseum audience, collectively, if only they had one throat. They'd been rooting for someone else it seems. I think a simple collective pimp-slap (with rings on) would have been adequate, or instructed the Praetorian Guard to inoculate them with laryngitis, yo.